Limbaugh Apologizes For The Spreading Piss Puddle At His Feet

Right-wing talk show host Rush Limbaugh, for those of you who don't already know, has been widely quoted in recent days making remarks about Sandra Fluke, a Georgetown University student who testified before congress on the need for insurance companies to cover contraception. His rather inflammatory statements have caused at least one of his sponsors (Citrix) to end their business relationship with his show, and others are reportedly considering doing likewise.
Limbaugh issued an apology for those statements today.
And that's what this post was going to be about. But evidently my computer skills aren't all they're cracked up to be, because while doing some copy and paste work with his quotes, gosh darn it, wouldn't you know it, I got his statements from the past few days all mixed up together, and now I can't tell which is which.
So I'll just make the best of the situation. Here, in random order, are bits of Limbaugh's recent statements:

In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke. She wants to be paid to have sex. It makes her a slut, right? It makes her a prostitute. In my monologue, I posited that it is not our business whatsoever to know what is going on in anyone’s bedroom nor do I think it is a topic that should reach a Presidential level. So, Ms. Fluke and the rest of you feminazis, here’s the deal. If we are going to pay for your contraceptives, and thus pay for you to have sex, we want something for it, and I’ll tell you what it is. We want you to post the videos online so we can all watch.  
What happened to personal responsibility and accountability? Where do we draw the line? The johns, that’s right. I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices. She is having so much sex, it’s amazing she can still walk. I created a national stir. 
 I think it is absolutely absurd that during these very serious political times, we are discussing personal sexual recreational activities before members of Congress. What does that make us? We’re the pimps.
Apologies for mixing up the quotes. But, with Limbaugh being the model of consistency that he is, I'm sure it will all make sense.

1 comment:

  1. I'm not sure how to say this without it's possibly offending Rushit or any of his shittohead disciples, so I won't bother. He's a piece of shit who makes money from attacking people with whom he disagrees. His followers? they don't even have that going for them. They're just sad lozerz.