Why didn't the world end as predicted on October 21, 2011?
1. Date miscalculated: Bible says "cubits," we were using furlongs.
2. Bad math: accidentally divided by "Zeeb."
3. Forgot to convert all time zones to Galactic Standard Upwhen.
4. We forgot to wear bags over our heads.
5. Iron chariots! Okay, cars. (See Judges 1:19.)
6. It's that damn pi thing again; that always screws up our calculations.
7. You don't understand--I'm invisible.
8. God announced that He has given us another chance to save ourselves, so we all need to change our evil ways.
9. God announced something or other that means you have to do what I say.
10. I don't know, and those people outside my house last night with the trumpets were not funny.