Ah, Those Children's Classics

It appears that the anti-vaccination crowd has branched out into a new medium to get their message across; the horrible dangers of disease-preventing vaccines, and the joys of "embracing childhood diseases," will now be communicated early and effectively to children with the publication of Melanie's Marvellous Measles, a groundbreaking new  book sure to become a classic piece of literature for the young.
Because diseases are natural, and nature is good and perfect, and Big Pharma or whoever don't want you to know that, and vaccines cause autism and communism and bagism and ismism and whatnot, it has become necessary to counter the lies and subvert the dominant paradigm as early in our children's lives as possible. Only through books such as this can we immunize  defend our children against the daily deluge of propaganda from the Medical Community. Hey, it's all about keeping them safe, right?  Safe from...doctors and stuff.
Shown here is an apparently real ad for an apparently real book for children, with Melanie taking off on the wonderful adventure known as the measles. 
This is an adventure that I have been on myself, having had the measles sometime, as near as I can figure, in 1963 or 1964. The memories are somewhat vague, but I'm pretty sure it didn't involve running through fields of pretty flowers while waving my arms around. Perhaps this book would have been useful then; maybe I just didn't take the right approach. Although I do think I could make a good argument that I embraced my childhood disease, if by "embracing childhood disease" you mean "picking at the little red pustules covering my body."
This might not be the best subject for humor, what with measles being a potentially crippling and even fatal disease, but I just can't help myself.
Without further ado, here are some other potential new children's classics, re-done with an eye toward singing the sweet joys of childhood illness.

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